Define "chronic" masturbator.
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
Randomize
