question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
nothing makes up for a small, perpetually flaccid penis quite like a British accent
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
just got back. in my inebriated state i broke an ugly lamp and was sent to the store (still drunk) to get a new one. just spent last half hour in isle 3 of dollar general surounded by more ugly lamps and trying not to throw up on each and every single one.
Randomize
