You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
...so i touched it.
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
Randomize
