So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
Randomize
