biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize
