yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
Randomize
