If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
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