my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
Randomize
