I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
Actions speak louder than pants.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
Randomize
