My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
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