definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
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