Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
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