you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
Im part way to drunk.
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
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