So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
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