This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
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