Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
Randomize
