If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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