my mouth tastes like poor choices
get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
Randomize
