I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
When did we convert life to cartoon?
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
I could fuck to npr.
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
Randomize
