Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
false alarm, still single
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
Randomize
