quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
do you know what's more awkward than a positive pregnancy in a public bathroom?
not a thing
walking in on a stranger's positive pregnancy test in a public bathroom
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
