I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
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