the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
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