Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
Randomize
