I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize
