carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
I have feelings that need drinking.
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
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