found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
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