The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
So many bounce houses so little time
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
Randomize