so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
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