You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
No more Irish car bombs ever.
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
Randomize