Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Redeem this text for a blowjob
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
Randomize
