maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
Randomize
