Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
Randomize
