office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
Just rescued a super cute pair of Gucci heels off the sorority lawn on my way to work. Things are worth two paychecks. Fuck trust fund kids.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
