She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
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