i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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