My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
I asked what it takes to be a good delivery driver, my new boss said "always keep these in your vehicle" as he handed me a flashlight and a blunt. I'm going to like this job.
Randomize
