What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
Randomize
