So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
Attn every girl I've slept with in the past 26 years of my life. One of you cunts gave me herpes. This is the 4th of 5 group MMS. That's right. It's in the 50s. There are two girls I don't have #s for. One was on a cruise and the other was a prostitute in Amsterdam. So which of you has herpes?
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
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