I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
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