Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
Randomize
