NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
Randomize