You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
She swung at the pinata with crutches
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
Randomize
