This is not my ceiling
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
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