I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
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