summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
Randomize