trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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