How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
I woke up with a hangover and a man bun. Reached over to drink water and accidentally chugged raspberry vodka. So there's that.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
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