i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
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