When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Randomize
